5 Red Flags: Identifying Toxic Friends
"Friendship" - a word that promises warmth and support. But what happens when this bond turns toxic?
Do you know the song "I’ll Be There for You" by the Rembrandts, originally written for the TV show Friends? That's what friendship should mean: a small family outside our own. People we can rely on and enjoy spending time with.
But how do you know they "won’t be there for you" when times get tough? According to the Whitehall II study, which observed over 10,000 people over 12 years, there's a very close relationship between toxic relationships, stress, and health.
How do you recognize if you're in a toxic BFF situation? Below we list the most important red flags to look out for in your friendship.
They only call when they’re feeling down
Everyone knows someone who likes to call when they're feeling down. Or to vent. Or because they need help, and you're the chosen one to deal with the problem or favor. These types of friends are usually easy to identify.
You feel drained after seeing them
Vampires exist not only in the Twilight Saga. They're among us. They breathe our air and suck out our positive energy. They're so-called energy vampires. It’s relatively easy to identify energy vampires. Pay attention to how you feel after the meeting. They don’t feed on blood but on your energy, and at the end of your meeting, you basically feel exhausted and overwhelmed.
They are the real-life Gossip Girl
If your friend loves to gossip, they may well be doing it behind your back. The biggest mistake you could make would be to automatically assume that they're not gossiping about you just because you're friends. The last thing you need is for all your secrets to be circulated within your circle of friends. So it might be time to let go of those primarily interested in gossip.
They love talking about themselves
These types of friends are naturally narcissistic and love the sound of their own voice the most. A simple "How are you?" is enough to trigger an elaborate talk about their own life. They love to drown in their endless monologues, and if you dare to say something, they often don't let you finish your sentence.
They are almost obsessed with you
Friends who show even the slightest hint of jealousy are a major red flag. They usually demand that you be available 100% of the time and get angry when you talk about other friends or, God forbid, decide to meet other friends. They want to know everything you did when you weren't together and even go so far as to check your phone. It looks like it might be time to distance yourself from these toxic friends.
These are just some signs that you're in an unhealthy friendship. The most obvious warning sign is if you thought of a specific friend while reading this post. Never forget that true friends are there for you when your day, week, month, or even year hasn't gone well.
